When my boss tells me I need to do things per "HR regulations"
How I feel when I have a beer after I havent drank all week.
When my Dad asks me how my dad is going.
When my boss asks me what my "duties" are.
When my boss calls me.
Talking to anyone in my office at any given time.
When I hear that someone right out of college makes twice as much as I do.
When I see someone wearing a crop top.
Talking to someone who doesnt know the difference between "your" and "you're"
When my friends ask my for relationship advice.
When I found out that devil dogs would no longer be available for purchase.
When I see a girl wearing tennis shoes at the bar.
When someone asks me how they should make themselves feel better.
When I hear people bitching about being fat.
How I feel when I go to any party at Metro.
When I see that there is a taco with mac and cheese, avocado, and sausage on the menu.
When someone tries to talk to me about their diet.
Me at my desk every morning..
Reading anything about politics.
When I accidentally "like" a photo of someone I've been stalking.
My closing statement in job interviews.
What my friends say to me.
When I see someone with an emo facebook status.
Walking into a pre game and seeing that several guys I've made out with are there.
When my parents friends ask why I'm still single.
When my friends ask what I did last night....
....and when they ask what I did this morning.
When my friends ask for advice what I offer them instead.
Trying to find my friends at coachella.
When people ask where my girlfriends are.
When my mom asks how my company party went.
When I have to go back to my old jean size.
When people ask what my salary is.
When my friends ask what I want for my birthday.
When perspective jobs ask me why I want to leave my current one.
When an interview asks where I see myself in five years.
Whenever I see a post from an adult on facebook.
How I feel when I'm at a table with all couples.
When I want dessert but my friend wont split anything with me.
When my friends cry to me about how shitty their lives are while meanwhile im dying over here.
When I post something on facebook that gets no "likes".
When i see my friends making kissy faces on facebook
When someone asks me if I'd like to go day drinking.
When I see that someone got bangs.
When I play wingwoman to Ross and Jamie.
The first thing I ask on a date.
